One day earlier in May, Corey woke up and decided that he didn't love me any more. In the conversation that followed he told me that I was not the same person that he fell in love with. I was no longer motivated, I had become complacent in my life. We were together for four years I reminded him about the first three.. How I was there while he wasn't working, provided him with a place to live, food to eat. I worked two jobs 7 days a week to keep shit together. How he got me pregnant twice and not once did I ask him for anything, not even his military insurance benefits. I worked my entire pregnancy to pay rent and make sure everything in our life was set. I had a very inexpensive small baby shower to prepare for the months ahead. The fourth year in our relationship, he provided me with an apartment and even though I still worked after having the baby, I was alone for a year doing everything on my own. It is not in my nature to get complacent. I do however put myself second to my spouse. He wanted to go back to school and both of us can't be in school because we have a child and we need money. So while he selfishly jumped at the opportunity to start over, I had been attempting to go to grad school for years.
As a woman, you have dreams. You have a vision of what you want to your life to be, what businesses you want to own, where you vacation. When you find someone you love, you tend to move that vision around them because love is about sacrifice and compromise. That day in May was a complete wake up call to me. I had always envisioned us as a team. However his words made it very clear that at any point, he could leave and I wouldn't have shit.
I have been secretly working on projects to get my life together. I have a son who I think about on a daily basis. I need to ensure that he is always good. I still have ambitions of opening my own float center and I started creating my crowd funding video. I personally know how hard it is to believe in yourself when no one else believes in you.
I've never had a dependence on any man but when you're stuck in that image of love you see in your grandparents it's difficult not to expect that kind of partnership. If my grandma was struggling so was my grandpa, they were a team. In my head, if we were fucked up, we would figure it out together. Sadly, in today's world, that's not what it is. I've learned my lesson.
If a man constantly speaks about his plans but doesn't ask you for opinion, mention you in his plans then he's planning without you. Don't get left behind. Be your own person, make your own money. Never give anyone the power of telling you that you aren't shit without them. You lived before them and you will excel after them.
As for me, I have started saving money again and collecting valuable coins and dollar bills from my job. My progress is slow but it's there. I will also be going to Ferrari Beauty School next month. I will be updating weekly with any new things that I'm doing savings wise or any investing.